It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
