Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Randomize
