I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
