She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize
