Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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