would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
