we have pet lesbian snakes
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
