how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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