i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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