he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
