Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
