there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Come see our sink grown plant.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
