dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Randomize
