with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize