I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
