So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
The power of my boobs compel you
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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