hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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