I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Randomize
