therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
My underwear smells like fireworks.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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