But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
