i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
All the doctor said was why
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
