Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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