therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
