You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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