Whoa Z and x make the same sound
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
