I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I'm both gender and math confused
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
