Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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