and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
