I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
soo... how was my night?
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