im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
