no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I understand Curling. That high.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
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