1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
