mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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