remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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