He uses pillows to masturbate.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
