They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
