did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
