I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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