it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
