Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
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