just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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