Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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