Non-Jews are for practice
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
