the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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