Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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