I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I have fence marks all over my body
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
