i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
