Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
