you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
