She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
